Fidelity and infidelity

By: Paulinos in Cuba

Paulinos en Cuba

After four years of happy marital life, Jorge and Carmen began to treat themselves badly, first with reciprocal indifference, then with increasingly violent discussions, which did not cease even when the son – a two-year-old boy – started crying scared as they screamed.
They endured one more season the hell they made themselves and in the end they made drastic resolutions.
I, who hadn’t visited them in a long time, one day I ran into Jorge and he confided in me that I hadn’t asked him to.
–I no longer live with Carmen…
–How like this? “I asked him,” they seemed so in love…
“You said it, “We looked like it.” Things changed radically and I stopped believing in her.
“And she,” I dared to ask, “did she still believe in you?
“I don’t know or care.
A few weeks later, I happened to learn that Jorge was hanging out with another woman before the difficulties between him and Carmen began.
Fidelity in marriage does not come down to living together; consists of living as husbands, keeping alive the love that one day moved them to unite their lives forever.
If one thought more of that “forever”, he would not marry lightly, but only after being sure that he had made a choice right and to be well prepared in every way: physical, mental, emotional, economic, social, religious…
Steam marriages are almost certain divorces.
But also fail those unions that did not know how to purify, nourish and grow the love that attracted them.
Do not confuse with love what can be only passion, emotion, enchantment. Many “lovers” might be asked how many times, in the past, they experienced the same thing and everything soon vanished like a straw fire.
It’s not always marital infidelity that depends on having made a mistake in choosing a partner. It is most often the result of carelessness and fragility. Those who want to be faithful in their marriage strive to be faithful day by day, in small things, and in special circumstances. If you have faith in love you have to know how to protect it, avoiding any detail that can stain it and any attitude that can understand it.

“My dog Yanko…”
An elementary school teacher took care to explain to her students the virtue of faithfulness and then asked them if anyone wanted to set an example. The first one who raised his hand said, “My dog Yanko.” Another shouted right away: “My dog Boby”; and – as by contagion – several others went on to say, “My Sultan dog”, “My Champion Dog”, “My Dog Brandy”, “My Little Dog Linda…”.
“All right, all right…,” the teacher interrupted, “but don’t just set your dogs as an example.
–Then…, my grandfather…! “He dared to say one of the children,” since my grandfather died every day, he puts flowers next to his portrait.

A virtue for all
We must all practice fidelity, not just husbands, who promised love for life. To be faithful is to be fulfilled; is to be consistent with one’s identity; is to be consistent in good; is to be observant of the rules of the group itself.
The fields of application of fidelity are many. You can be faithful
to the given word;
to the convictions themselves;
to the homeland;
good customs and traditions;
to the duties of the state itself;
religion that is professed…
Among the most famous books in the world, many praise the virtue of fidelity and illustrate it with memorable episodes. In the “book of books,” the Bible, fidelity appears as an attribute of God and the most trustworthy men; on the contrary, he disapproves and fustigated infidelity. Among the parables of Jesus Christ we find that of a master who, before embarking on a journey, entrusted his goods to his servants. On their return he called them one by one. He who had received many riches in entrusts them managed to duplicate them; instead, the one who had received few hid them leaving them unproductive. This evil servant was treated as unworthy and lazy, while at first the master called him honest and fulfilling, and he feared it with the entrusting of even greater goods. Thus spoke his lord, “Since you have been faithful in the little, I put you at the forefront of the most important matters” (Mt 25:21).

Fidelity only flourishes in good land
The deep root of fidelity is faith in a person or at a certain value. The fertile land in which it germinates and blooms is the nobility of the person’s spirit. A non-virtuous person is usually not the subject of fidelity: he shows no consistency because he does not in fact have it, by lacking convictions or moral energy to put them into practice.
From a vulgar and dishonest individual, he cannot be expected to be true to his word, to his duties, to his identity. Because he does not feel the commitment and greatness of fidelity, it is easy for him to make promises, even knowing that he will not keep them. This is abhorrent, both for men and for God, who, in the Ecclesiastes, stands guard against that lightness: “If you make a promise to the Lord, do not take time to fulfill it, because he does not like fools. The vote you’ve made, keep it. You better not make a promise than make it and not keep it” (Ecl 5.3-4).
The faithful person conquers the trust of others and everywhere is an agent of progress and inspires security. When someone wants to defend themselves against a false accusation, they turn to credible witnesses who speak for them. “The truthful witness,” Solomon said, “is a safe haven, but he who ingests lies is but an imposter” (Prov 14:25). From the same sage is this other proverb: “The gossip reveals secrets, while faithful man keeps due reservation” (Prov 11.13).
In many popular phrases and sayings it is collected and expresses the great esteem that fidelity deserves: “You have to be faithful to the cause”, “The promised is debt”, “Fulfill is a matter of honor”, “It is not faithful that he fulfills sometimes, but the one who always fulfills”, “Who is faithful in the little, will also be in a lot”, “I believe and show you with the facts” , “To him who is fulfilled and faithful, everything tastes like honey; the renegade and unfaithful everything is made of ice.” Ω

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